Reflections

"What are you doing tomorrow night?", asked a friend.
"What is tomorrow night?", I asked. Then a fraction of second later it hit me . .
"ahh, new year's eve".It set me thinking (a lot of things do that to me these days :-)).
What the new year means to me. How the new year's eve has evolved over time for me.
The earliest recollection of Dec31st for me is during middle school. Jan 1st always meant the start of school after winter holidays. There would invariably be lot of unfinished winter projects and assignments that had to be completed. So Dec31st was always a hectic affair. Sitting in front of the TV, watching the bollywood stars and starlets dance to the beats of the "hit" songs of the year gone by and writing out that assignment.
Then as I got to high school, I got to partying on Dec31st. The whole family would go off to a club/ resort, stay till the "countdown" followed by fireworks, come home satisfied that we had done our bit to usher in the new year and hit the sack.Somewhere down the line this partying mode faded out of practice. Dec31st had become just another day; Nothing special to be done, no special resolutions to be made and broken.

But as is my wont these days, I could not resist reflecting on the year gone by and penning down my thoughts:
This year has probably been my worst year. I say "probably" because till now I have never though of evaluating an year as good/ bad.It has been a personal roller coaster ride. A lot of highs, some very deep lows and a general feeling of melancholy.
Some very painful memories, painful because the memories are so sweet and now no longer a reality but just a memory. Add to that, the happenings in the world, with faltering economies, terrorism etc and you have the recipe for a perfectly bad year. But as always, there is a glimmer of hope, that with a new day, a new year, a new beginning can be made to control the damage if not repair it completely.

Happy new year.

Quite unrelated to this post but somehow relevant in a twisted way to my feelings right now, I am pasting two poems below;
One,A beautiful poem I received as an email forward and the second, an sms that brings back splendid memories of a slice of life I will always look back at with a great deal of fondness.

Someone Somewhere

A thick haze settles over the ocean,
The horizon turns pink as far as the eye can see.
All creatures hurry back home,
As the sun plunges into the sea.
Someone somewhere made a fortune today,
Someone somewhere lost all that he ever had.
Someone will sleep with a smile on his face,
Someone with a heavy heart will be sad.
Someone somewhere was born to rule,
Someone somewhere was born to die.
Someone today found someone he loves,
Someone has left someone to cry.
Someone's life has changed today,
For some, it was just another day.
Someone somewhere is dumbfounded by his good fate,
Someone has nothing more left to say.
The beauty of this setting sun, Is too divine for me to summarize.
As I sit here and watch the setting sun,
Someone somewhere sees it rise......

-Anonymous


Reflections

A rose is nature's fairest flower,
Each bud in its perfection,
holds promise that a lovely bloom
Will catch the sun's reflection.

July 8 2007

I am waiting in line, to receive my graduation certificate......My thoughts begin to wander......
The last last few months have been hectic. Things and situations have changed, but then they haven'nt.
Life seems to be going on - as normal as ever, as busy as ever. There always seems to be a never-ending flow of things to do. Life seems like a race; a race that one seems to be running in, without really knowing where it leads to. All that one notices is that he is running on a highway with a lot of other people runing in front, behind and alongside. Suddenly there is a realisation that he must stop otherwise life will drift away in known, seemingly safe directions, only to be someday buried in unremembered and worthless destinations. It is at these moments at the cross roads of life there comes along some divine spark that strikes us - and we make that decision, that significant and crucial decision, that will someday shape our destiny.

I realised that the highway run is not what I want, I want to run a race where there is no routine path, where there is no easy decision. A crossroad from which various paths emerge - right, wrong, unknown, strange and uncharted.The first time I felt like this, was over 3 years back. Since then, at every junction of life, I get the feeling that I am taking a crucial decision, one that will forever change my life. Later I realise that things have not really changed all that much or not at all. This makes it all very confusing. What is seemingly most important now, becomes insignificant once a decision is taken and acted upon. So what is important and what is not?

If one cares to pause this rushed life of ours, playback the events in slow motion, we begin to understand; Our thoughts become clear. It becomes clear, how the little things in our life have fallen in place on the jigsaw puzzle. How the bigger pieces on which we spent our energies are really the easier ones to put in place; How the smaller, seemingly trivial pieces are vital, to complete the puzzle and to understand the bigger picture.. At this juncture one might also contemplate on the decisons about how the paths that we took - the supposedly right paths - never lead us anywhere. How we missed the forest for the trees, just because we failed to look deeper, or perhaps because we were not prepared to take the road less travelled.

We then wish that we could go back and take another path. Ofcourse, we cannot. However we can learn to be more careful further on and learn to recognize the key moments in life, learn to spot those subtle clues that life throws us. Ofcourse, that key moment will just pass by like any other, if we are not strong enough to resist the divergent pulls of the oft treaded paths. It needs a strong passion and courage to swim against the tide. The first step to do this lies in being able to realise that we are being carried away by the waves in random directions; to realise that we still have not attained the strength and passion that we can achieve, if only we dig deeper.

I feel that I have not still attained my full strength or found my calling in life. Someday in the future when I am ready for it, I want to be able to realise when I am actually living my key moment- A chance meeting, a big decision, or just a simple little talk, which will turn life upside down and make all the difference- and not have to rewind and play it back in my mind in flashback mode.I have taken many turns on the path that I chose a long time back, I do not know where it will lead me to- only time will tell;
The most recent juction that I crossed in my life was graduation from IIITB, and transiting from a student life to a professional work life. The journey so far has been memorable. Newer experiences and equally interesting times are ahead.

SWEET & SOUR

Ant, grasshopper
Old version


The ant works hard in the withering heat all summer, building his house and laying up supplies for the winter. The grasshopper thinks the ant’s a fool and plays the summer away. Come winter, the ant is warm and well-fed. The grasshopper has no food or shelter so he dies out in the cold.


Modern version

The ant works hard in the withering heat all summer, building his house and laying up supplies for the winter. The grasshopper thinks the ant’s a fool and plays the summer away. Come winter, the shivering grasshopper calls a press conference and demands to know why the ant should be allowed to be warm and well-fed while others are cold and starving.

NDTV, BBC, CNN show up to provide pictures of the shivering grasshopper next to a video of the ant in his comfortable home.

Arundhati Roy stages a demonstration in front of the ant’s house. Medha Patkar goes on a fast demanding that the grasshoppers be relocated to warmer climates during winter. Amnesty International and Kofi Annan criticise the Indian Government for not upholding the fundamental rights of the grasshopper. Left parties call for “Bharat bundh” in West Bengal and Kerala. CPM in Kerala passes a law preventing ants from working hard so as to bring about equality of poverty among ants and grasshoppers. The judicial committee drafts the Prevention of Terrorism Against Grasshoppers Act (POTAGA), with effect from the beginning of the winter. Arjun Singh makes special reservation for grasshopper in educational and government service.

The ant is fined for failing to comply with POTAGA and, having nothing left to pay his retroactive taxes, his home is confiscated and handed over to the grasshopper in a ceremony. Arundhati Roy calls it “a triumph of justice”. CPM calls it the “revolutionary resurgence of the downtrodden”. Many years later... The ant has since migrated to the US and set up a multi-billion dollar company in Silicon Valley. 100s of grasshoppers still die of starvation... Losing a lot of hard working ants and feeding grasshoppers, India is still a “developing” country.



(Courtesy: Vipin Bucksey, New Delhi)
Appeared in Deccan Herald March 2, 2007

Stopping By Woods On A Snowy Evening

Stopping By Woods On A Snowy Evening.
- Robert Frost.


Whose woods these are I think I know.
His house is in the village, though;
He will not see me stopping here
To watch his woods fill up with snow.


My little horse must think it's queer
To stop without a farmhouse near
Between the woods and frozen lake
The darkest evening of the year.

He gives his harness bells a shake
To ask if there's some mistake.
The only other sound's the sweep
Of easy wind and downy flake.

The woods are lovely, dark, and deep,
But I have promises to keep,
And miles to go before I sleep,
And miles to go before I sleep.

--

This is one of my favourite poems, after John Milton's "On His Blindness"

Wonder Years

Growing up happens in a heartbeat.
One day you're in diapers, the next day you're gone.
But the memories of childhood stay with you for the long haul.
I remember a place ... a town ... a house like a lot of houses ...
A yard like a lot of other yards ...On a street like a lot of other streets.
And the thing is ... After all these years,I still look back ... with wonder.

Happenings around me in the past few days brought back memories ....memories archived in remote parts of my brain. These made me smile, laugh quietly and brought tears to my eye in the knowledge that I would never again see the person who helped create all those memories.


I see an older generation passing by, bidding goodbye to this world,( I pray ) headed for a peaceful afterlife. Some are gone, few are left...and will cause the inevitable feeling of loss to those they leave behind. We are like the green leaf, watching the old leaves wither away, reminding us of our own mortality and reminding us to enjoy life to the fullest.

Mirror mirror on the .......

Give the world the best you have, and the best will come back to you. This world of ours is like a mirror. It merely mirrors and gives back to every man the reflection of his own thoughts and actions. Frown at it and it will scowl back at you, laugh at/with it, and you will find it a jolly good fellow.
No doubt, our success or failure is of our own making, but others can contribute significantly to our success/happiness or otherwise.i.e it is closely linked to the attitudes and actions of others around us. Usually such actions and attitudes turn out to be a reflection of our own attitudes and actions towards them.

CSR

A poem

When I born, I Black,
When I grow up, I Black,
When I go in Sun, I Black,
When I scared, I Black,
When I sick, I Black,
And when I die, I still black..
And you White fella,
When you born, you Pink,
When you grow up, you White,
When you go in Sun, you Red,
When you cold, you Blue,
When you scared, you Yellow,
When you sick, you Green,
And when you die, you Gray..
And you calling me Colored ??


-written by an African kid.........


I came across this poem in my mail and felt like posting it.

Motivation

Things are tough- You enjoy the challenge, Work hard and reap the rewards.

Things become easy- So no longer challenging! Slack off, start going downhill.

That describes my present situation.

Dr.Rajkumar

Dr. Rajkumar: Incredible Actor, magnificent singer, simple person, honoured for his genourisity
RIP 1929-2006

Date of Birth - 24/4/1929 at Gajanur.
First Movie - Bedara Kanappa in 1954
200th movie-Devatha Manushya
Raj sung his first song in Mahishasura Mardini(Tumbitu manava...).
However, his singing career started when he sung'yaare kugadali..' in sampathige savaal.


His films which created history in Kannada Cinema Industry: Bangaradha Manushya, Kastoori Nivasa , Babruvana, Bhakta Prahalada, Shankar Guru, Gandhadha Gudi, Jeevana chaitra, Aakasmika etc.,

Awards of significance:
He received the Padma Bhushan award from the Government of India and the Dadasaheb Phalke Award in 1995, in recognition of his contributions to the Kannada film industry.
His fans have conferred him the title "Nata Saarvabhowma" (The Emperor of Acting).

"Friendship has no expiry date".
This was part of a text message i received on my mobile phone, from a close friend.It set me thinking. Is it really true? Is a good friendship something that lasts forever and grows better with age? Many of us would have tales of how we have nurtured a friendship over a long period of time. But for each such special friendship that is spread over a decade or more, how many broken friendships are strewn along the path? Even people perceived as being very close to eachother have drifted apart/cant stand each other's presence.
My opinion on this is thus: Human beings always seek some gain in whatever they do. The gain need not always be something materialistic. The friends we make at any point in our life depend on our circumstances. Though one does not befriend someone having only ulterior motives( that is not friendship anyhow!), quite unconsciously almost all of us tend to be friends with people who will at some point of time be useful to us. We befriend those who share some common activity.So friends are mostly circumstantial. Once the common thread that held the friendship together, no longer exists or is no longer strong enough, the friends tend to drift apart i.e the friendship reaches its expiry date.